Monday, November 26, 2007

A Day Off... ( Sort of....)

My gig with Lojo was beyond wonderful and more fun than a basket of Kitties , but I am still tired, two nights of full on entertainment, improv ( both with comedy and the music, we hardly know any of each others songs ) complete with a full moon ( so, yeah, we were pretty crazed, nowhere near Malena-crazed tho, that girl does NOT mess around on the full moon. I would tell you what she turns into but you wouldn't believe me and then she would have to kill me. Some things must remain secret... )

SO last night, being the walking dead anyway, my friend Jen and I ( she came to the show and seemed to enjoy it ) decided to dress up as Vampires and make Indian food and watch Underworld ( hey, Kate Beckinsale in leather, with guns, as a Vampire??? Who cares about PLOT for goodness sake??? )

All very fun, except it took me a while to DRESS and all, and Freaky Venus Seaweed is onto the fact that when I spend that much time in front of the mirror, I am going OUT. Not cool in Freaky's little brain. She may not pay any attention to ME while I am here sometimes, but I really OUGHT to be available to her at all times.

( cats SO look down on dogs with an air of complete superiority, with good reason )

She devised a most thorough retribution.

Now, occasionally she will take down a roll of toilet paper, ( she doesn't trust it, they can be sneaky ) or take all my contact lens wrappers out of the trash and chase them around the house ( they can be fast when they get going ) or knock down all the skeletons in my Halloween town ( hey, I can understand that, who wouldn't ? ) but last night, while I was out haunting , she got INTO the cupboard, took out ALL the rolls of paper towels, ( I think there were four ) and shredded them within an inch of their poor little lives. ( and remember , this Evil Bengal has Softpaws covers on her claws )

I called the police on her.

See if I bail her Kitty Butt out of jail. I am still picking the stuff up. ( no, my camera battery is NOT here yet, sigh. )

Now today , I heard from the Police that they are considering sueing me for the cost of the Hospital Bills resulting from the fact that Venus strongly resisted arrest and sent three Officers to intensive care.....

Sigh.

There you have it. Now you know. A Day Off in the Life of a Personal Assistant and Entertainer.

Love and Evil Kitties,
Lorraine